Monday, February 8, 2010

Be sure of this...

Cancer can be lonely. 

I have so many beautiful people around me walking this journey with me and yet much of the time I feel very alone. I think one of the hardest things is that even the people who I am closest to can't really understand how it feels. We are not able to relate in that way because they haven't been down the same road exactly. They can sympathize, and listen, and care, and provide for me, but they can't know how it feels. It's no one's fault. That's just how it is. Unless you have been diagnosed with cancer yourself, you just can't know completely how it feels. And honestly, I can't understand completely how my closest family and friends feel because I haven't been in their shoes as a family member of a cancer patient. So there is a disconnect that manifests itself in loneliness. 

I know that God wants to use this feeling to teach me more about who He is. And to teach me that I am totally dependent on Him and no one else, even when I think I can handle things myself. When it all boils down, the truth is that it is always about me and God. Will I trust that He's here even in the most lonely moments? Will I wait for Him and listen for Him? Will I run to Him? 

When my children were little (and still to this day) whenever they were feeling lonely, or afraid, or facing new challenges, I would tell them to remember that they are never alone. Jesus is always walking with them. I would tell them in those frightening moments to squeeze their hand and remember who is holding it.

I am squeezing my hand today. Thank you, God, that you are here.

"And be sure of this: I am with you always..." Matthew 28:20

"...the Lord is the One who holds (my) hand." Psalm 37:24

3 comments:

  1. God is holding your hand and so are all your brothers and sisters who are unwilling members of the "cancer club". A big squeeze from me.
    Love,
    Debbie

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  2. Hi Laura,

    Thinking of you today and the woman that God is molding into such a magnificent work of art!! I know that you will use these lessons to bless someone else.

    Softly I announce my presence. Shimmering hues of radiance tap gently at your consciousness, seeking entrance. Though I have all Power in heaven and on earth, I am infinitely tender with you. The weaker you are, the more gently I approach you. Let your weakness be a door to My Presence. Whenever you feel inadequate, remember that I am your ever-present Help.

    Hope in Me, and you will be protected from depression and self-pity. Hope is like a golden cord connecting you to heaven. The more you cling to this cord, the more I bear the weight of your burdens; thus, you are lightened. Heaviness is not of my kingdom. Cling to hope and my rays of Light will reach you through the darkness.

    Psalm 46:1; Romans 12:12; Romans 15:13


    Love ya!!
    C.O.L.E.'s Foundation
    (Caring Openly, Loving Eternally)
    www.colesfoundation.com
    Email: sandy@colesfoundation.com
    24/7 Prayer Line 888-365-COLE (2653)
    Sandy Daron

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  3. I can only imagine... but can't know. As much as I think I know....makes me despise it, fear it, wish to slay it, run as fast as I can hoping it won't catch me... and thats all I know is what I fear and hate of it. Its no doubt a very humanly lonely place to be when cancer manages to creep inside. Its time like those when thank God we have God and He has us. Otherwise, I would think it would be nothing short of unbearable without Gods presence and love and reassurance of His care over me.

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