Thursday, September 24, 2009

Day 2

I had trouble falling asleep Wednesday night. I was very stressed. I woke up Thursday morning with my head hurting, my back aching, my port site aching, and I was nauseous. I wished I could just skip this day. I don't want to live it. Unfortunately I have to get up and go get more chemotherapy. I don't want to do this. I am totally spent physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. I cried most of the day. The tears wouldn't stop. I was sick at my stomach most of the day. I have no appetite and yet I know it is important for me to eat.

We got in the car to come home from the oncologist's office and Jeremy Camp's song was on the radio:

"I will walk by faith, even when I cannot see."

That's what we're doing, walking by faith. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.


  1. Laura,
    The Lord has brought believers like me, people you've never heard of, to your blog to pray for you!
    He's with you, Loves you, and will get you through this!
    God Bless!
    Jamie (SD)

  2. Dearest Laura, how my heart hurts with you for all you are going through.
    I have been asking God what shall I say.
    He very clearly impressed upon me to Let HIM SPEAK thru David - personally to you -
    . Psalm 119:49-51 (Amplified Bible)
    92Unless Your law had been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction.
    93I will never forget Your precepts, [how can I?] for it is by them You have quickened me (granted me life).
    49Remember [fervently] the word and promise to Your servant, in which You have caused me to hope.
    50This is my comfort and consolation in my affliction: that Your word has revived me and given me life.(A)
    Love and Many

  3. Oh my friend,
    I am so very, very sorry. It's just not o.k. You are free falling right now, but there is a parachute. I wish I could drive to your house and cry with you! Remember I told you it is called "chemosobby" :)There are no words...just know I understand. So lifting you in prayer!!!!

  4. praying through this nite.. YOU ARE STRONG because he is carrying you ... focusing on your tummy as I go to prayer .. Let her FLOAT through this Father.. lift her UP over this...the GOOD day is near ! (gooder day)
    Jean, NC

  5. I am so sorry this was a "bad" day. May God bless you with a great night's sleep and complete rest. May tomorrow be a much better day - no side effects!!!!!!!!!!!
    I keep thinking of the statement, "When there is nothing left but God, that is when you find out that God is all you need".

    I am continuing to pray for complete healing and that these treatments will be over before you know it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    In prayer,

  6. Sweet sorry that today was not as good as you were hoping...I can not imagine what you are feeling but I know that you are a strong woman and can face anything with God by your side and Mark too!! But remember that you need to rest physically, emotionally and in whatever area you are tired. Let us worry for you and stress for you and carry you like Chris said on Women's night so that you can rest. We love you so very much!

  7. Laura, praying for you and for Mark...I pray this is over for you soon with complete and total healing and no chance of reoccurence...and for NO side effects. God bless you both!!
    With love,
    Vickie D

  8. I'm so sorry.

    2 Corinthians 12:9:
    "…My strength is made perfect in weakness."

    I feel quite sure there was an angel stroking your hair as you cried. Its going to be okay, it will get better.

  9. I'm praying for you Laura. Hope you have a better day. =)

  10. Let "Jesus take the wheel"......lifting you and all that are going through the various types of treatments in prayer daily! Hope you feel the "BIG HUGS" I am sending your way!

    Love ya,
    Paula P.

  11. Laura, it breaks my heart knowing how difficult this is for you and your family. And I just know that while that angel is stroking your hair, you are sitting in the hand of God and He is catching your tears as the fall! Prayers, prayers and more prayers, Jeanne

  12. Oh my sweet friend,

    I am crying with you. The lack of sleep is probably due to the steroids. I had this problem... if it continues ask for something to help you sleep. I know... and I understand. I am praying for you. I love you. Call me if I can do anything for you.


  13. Laura, the kids and I are praying for you daily. I pray your pain subsides! love you.

  14. Laura,
    You don't know me personally, but I do know your dear friend Teri.
    It took my breath away hearing Mark talk about you this morning. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I don't know why, but felt like you just needed to hear that. Praying for you to feel better soon, and thank you for being such an inspiration.

  15. Laura,
    You don't know me but I've been praying for you for the past few months. I know it is very difficult, but please know there are many of us lifting you to the Lord in prayer. You are not alone, He will never leave you. Thank you Jesus for giving Laura a song in the night.

    Ann Cates