I had an appointment with the surgeon last week. As I sat in the waiting room I started thinking of all the things that had happened in the three months since I'd seen him last:
I traveled to Africa, Costa Rica, Colorado, and Galveston; I enjoyed time with all my kids; I visited with all my extended family; Sarah got engaged; we bought a wedding dress; we baptized 95 people, we buried two friends.
I was so thankful to be alive! And so thankful to be the healthy person in the waiting room!
As these thoughts swirled around in my mind, the voices of an elderly couple in the room broke through my thinking. They were there to see the doctor. She was obviously sick. And they were discussing the fact that this was the final road. They weren't upset. They weren't sad. In fact, they were happy, reminiscing about all the good things they had experienced together in their life. It was such a beautiful, peaceful, intimate conversation, I almost felt guilty for overhearing them. Such love. Such bravery. Such beauty.
I wondered to myself, "When my time finally comes, will I face it with such grace and faith?"
Once again I heard the words "All Clear!" from the surgeon. He congratulated me on the two year anniversary of my initial surgery. He reminded me that we are going to continue to be aggressive in monitoring me for any recurrence. I thanked him for that.
I walked to the car, fighting back tears - tears of joy and gratitude for more time to live. Honestly, I wanted to shout it to the whole world: "I DON'T HAVE CANCER ANYMORE!!!"
Instead, I hopped in the car, sent an "All Clear" text message to Mark, and hit I-10 for the drive home. I turned on the radio and the words of "Even Now" by Will Reagan of United Pursuit began to play. They perfectly expressed the fullness of my heart:
"Your love is sweeter than honey, Your love is stronger than death, Your love lifts me of my burdens, and shows me how to dance."